Sex Toy Review: Monkey Spanker

Monkey SpankerNaturally, I couldn’t test Ann Summers’ Monkey Spanker by myself, so I had to enlist the help of my other half. We were both a little dubious about the effectiveness of the toy as it obviously doesn’t behave or feel like a mouth or a vagina. However, we persevered.

As you can see from the photo, the Monkey Spanker has a hole designed to fit the penis through. What you can’t see is the slot on the back of the handle which holds a small vibrating bullet. The idea is to fit the penis (with LOTS of lube) through the hole, then manoeuvre the toy up and down to simulate masturbation. From a woman’s point of view, this is slightly easier than giving a hand job as it doesn’t strain the wrist so much.

However, from the man’s point of view there is no variation. Using a hand (either yourself or your partner’s) you can vary the grip, the movement and so on, whereas the Monkey Spanker is very much “up-down up-down.” The vibrating bullet adds some spice to proceedings, but it only has the one setting, again meaning there is little variation. Given how women’s sex toys have come on in recent years, I think toys like this one will soon follow suit. The boys will soon come to expect more from their sex toys!

Don’t get me wrong, the toy does what it says on the tin, but in a very basic way. There’s little variation, and to make it comfortable for the fella, you’re going to need a considerable amount of lube. For this price (currently £20 on Ann Summers’ website) though, it’s a good idea if you’re looking for something different in the bedroom, particularly for fellas who do not like the idea of masturbating using a synthetic vagina.

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